Nothing is truly perfect

Session 2 (the therapist) 

She thought she knew what had started her life by the bottle. If she moved back she would go to that moment when the man she devoted herself to had confessed to having an affair. He’d broken her heart and said he loved the other woman. She had kept a straight face and asked for a divorce only to cry herself to sleep after he’d left. That tragic death he received was an insult to her. He’d gotten away with breaking her heart and made her look like the villain.

She was a model human. A beautiful woman with an outstanding career and a perfect family. She had two children who were exemplary in everything they did and her favourite part was her man. The man she had fallen in love with ,crowning her success with the enviable highschool romance story. Her ambition drove her to be the best and she knew nothing less. Everything changed when he broke her heart. It was a failure she couldn’t deal with.

Have you ever thought of what a pianist would sound like playing from the bottom of the sea?  That is the only analogy that gets close to her experience. The pianist will put in all the right keys and then when she starts dropping in the sea she will loose her calm and make a few frantic moves. The audience will still be moved but few will notice the change. Soon. In an attempt to save the piece she will go wild and the result is turning completely off key. At this point the audience is aware but the pianist is not finally the pianist is tone deaf and that’s when she realises she is lost but at this point she’s at the bottom of the sea.

She believed in things going her way and not making any mistakes. That’s how she got into drinking bottles of vodka alone on her bathroom floor. The liqour comforted her. That scotch made her feel like she had courage to do it alone as she always had. So she drank and for a while she was the widow who had overcome tragedy and become an amazing mom and career woman. Then slowly she slacked and the root of all her problems came up and she knew she was lost.

You see her addiction is the equivalent of a plague to the soul. She craved for perfection. The biggest problem is; perfect doesn’t exist.

#girl41

#diaryof1000girls.

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