Invisible wall.

There she was young and vibrant with the excitement that comes with the need to learn. She’s exploring the world and loving every moment of it. She was in a new world and she had convinced herself she was ready for it.

She waltzed into the school complex early and from the moment she walked through that entry door a new reality hit her. her confidence in her resolve was slowly growing out. Life was being more obvious. She was in a fish out of water situation. Foreign land means unfamiliarity, loneliness, instability and a whole lot of anxiety all things she hadn’t learnt to deal with appropriately. We have to appreciate our weaknesses. Only those that do this can find a way to manipulate their weakness so that they don’t affect them so much…anyway back to her day.

She zombied out through the day until it was finally over. All she wanted was a trace of familiarity something to keep her rooted to home other than the wristband she wore on her hand as a public declaration of her patriotism. Food is good for the soul and that was her solution a nice restaurant that would serve quisines from home. That would definitely fix up her soul.

There she was getting on a motorbike. It was the most common mode of transportation there. She asked the rider if he knew where she wanted to go and he nodded in agreement. Afterwards they agreed on payment and there she was. An hour later and she was still switching lanes going to a place she only knew by name.

Lo! and behold! The rider stops and a random drop of point and looks at her and starts speaking with a smile on his face. His words are foreign to her. She has no idea what he is saying. She responds to him and realises that he also has no idea what she’s saying. It’s time for a solution… Another rider is called in now this one knows the language bit has no idea where the destination is. Helper number three happened to be a traffic police officer. He spoke in her tongue with a strain but also didn’t know the directions. Person number four is called and finally the solution is found.

She got to her destination eventually although she was about half an hour late. The home food and the second part of her mixed feelings resurfaced. The conviction in her heart was strong.

She was in a new world… This meant new opportunities,a clean slate,it meant adventure and not anxiety, new social experiments not loneliness. In getting lost she had found herself. She had be graced with an opportunity to cause change and not be an effect of change. This was the secret to survival. So she finished her meal, walked out of the restaurant,and hailed for another rider. Once beaten twice shy wasn’t a theory she would accept.….part of that story is me. I got lost in Kigali, Rwanda while on a public motorbike (Moto). It took a village to get me help specifically two police officers, two riders and one kind sivilian .

There’s a very high chance the excitement of being in a new country may cloud you from any home sick feelings. First days could be epic or hectic. It’s all a random pick from a deck of cards.

The only way to survive is by knowing who you are. You need to challenge yourself to do more and be more. Being afraid is your greatest enemy. So explore…get lost and find your way. Take a detour instead of using your normal route,learn a new language. Create for yourself a Eutopia of good vibes, positivity and confidence. In a short while the wall shall collapse and you shall no longer be that fishy fish out of water.

Ofcourse give me ideas of how to adjust too. There’s always room for more learning and new adventures.

Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to any of the photos.

#girl63

#diaryof1000girls.

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Don’t say that B word

Every once in a while I’m graced with a life event worth sharing. Here is one. 

I’m seated in the most comfortable way I can.  I’ve been okay or atleast I thought I was okay.  I was actually just looking at the stars and trying to give definitive meanings to random things. I’m in a bus and this is the longest roadtrip ever. 

Let me put things into perspective here. About eight months ago I got accepted into an amazing university. It was a highlight of my life. To be more specific it was number two on the list of my favourite days ever.  The school happens to be in a different country from where I’ve  grown up, to the country I was born one, probably hectic, new year’s Eve ( I’m speaking from a woman in labour point of view)… That is how I found myself in an overnight trip to a whole different country.  From the moment I got on at 5pm up until 9:30pm I was okay then  after one last call everything changed.  Here I am about to tell you the top five reasons I’m going to miss being in Kenya. I’ve got an endless list but this will do for now…Yaaas I’m Kenyan as Kenyan as it gets.

I can’t get over the fact that patriotism runs through our veins. Our telephone code is upheld like a brand  that must be felt by the universe. Our flag and the national goals of peace love and unity are things you can trace in every single field of our lives.  We might have gone through a few low moments but there’s something magical about how we love each other.

Kenyans know how to have fun. What is low-key? We go all out whether it’s with turning up or it’s with memes. You can always count on a good laugh and a good time here.  Most recent is the Githeri-man affair. During such a tense period due to general elections shows up this Githeri-man and all his memes and his story and the tense atmosphere gets a break as we all unite to share the joy ,suprise and laughter. Plus we don’t ever just stop with only local memes we go all out with creative minds ohhh people in Hollywood should see what we do. And do I have to mention the way we filled up a stadium during the World Under 18 athletics…

Ohh my boy from coffee town. That’s my secret favourite human. The person who holds the spot of the highlight of my life.  I’ll probably have to write a whole separate post to explain him to you. The boy from ‘coffee town’ unknowingly changed my life forever. Leaving him has to be the greatest tragedy of my life. Don’t get me wrong this isn’t my boyfriend or anything like that. Currently he’s a friend.One who did to me what Dorian Gray did to Sybil – the picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde…  He deserves a greater honour than a mere feature and that’s why I shall say no more of him on this post.

Kenya is where I learnt to love. It is in this country that I have grown in love. Learning all that I know and slowly being moulded into the young woman I am. One who can love, love wisely, fight, heal and give love to others.  This is where my family,girlfriends,my boys,flings, crushes , situationships and all forms of relations I’ve ever had land.  It is in this beautiful country that I learnt to see beauty for what it is. My heart is what it is because of the people I’ve been surrounded by,those acquaintance and even the people I watched every now and then.

I am a fighter.  I have a feeling I was born this way based on all the stories I hear about my childhood.  Regardless of all that this nature was strengthened by being Kenyan. Because Kenyans make it no matter what cost. We are go getters. This is the country where a man trained himself into being an Olympian (Julius Yego). We fight for what we want. It is probably how I landed myself in the situation​ I’m in now. No dream is too being for true Kenyan soul. It is in the +254 that I found all the right support to get through having scoliosis at 13 and a major spinal surgery at 16. In this country that children from the most humble of backgrounds find their way into the best education institutions. Because in this country we fight and we support each other. We respect the struggle and the journey that we face

Leaving my home, my friends (however small my circle may be) , my family, my country is going to be one major adjustment.  I’m going to have to learn to live,love,laugh and learn from somewhere else.  I have to simply trust that even as life moves on I am not left behind in the changes. 

To all my epic Kenyan readers. Tuko pamoja kama jubilee (no offense intended to anyone)… I shall be always here constantly appreciating your feedback,views and support…. Hold up have I mentioned how much I shall miss  Kiswahili. Even the annoying. Xaxa and Thenx  language….cheeesos I cannot even.

Tutaonana baadaye… I’m not saying that B word. This isn’t the end we are just flipping a new chapter. I shall keep you informed, entertained and educated all through as it is my vow and purpose.

Sincerely,

Jerry L.M .Kariuki,

Author: Diaryof1000girls.

#girl62

#diaryof1000girls.

Rude Awakening

Something different happened as I took my very ussual route to school. Right from when I stepped out of the house there was a difference in the atmosphere.  It looked like a huge disaster had happened the previous night and now disaster management was trying to clean up. In reality,the disaster had struck ages ago.
I leaned on the window of the vehicle and slowly watched the biggest hoax of the decade unfold before my eyes. To put things into perspective it’s April 2017 and in Kenya that means it’s campaign season. The time for the craziest stunts to be pulled off by aspiring political leaders. 

There were trucks on the side of the road and manual labourers busy fixing the drainage system. Blocked sewage pipes were being unclogged and pavements were being swept. Then there was the cliché stunt they pull of every five years.potholes being filled. At this rate this little county was a masterpiece of development. It’s also not hard to miss the colourful billboards no longer advertising commercial products but political figures. In all honesty I’m starting to feel like we are part of some national beauty pageant with all these carefully branding and aluring catchphrases.

We’ve all seen this act before every fifth year the country goes through peak development with so many projects under development and rising employment rates then after elections we hit a four year dry spell with the country slowly being dragged into the mud.

A passenger seated next to me made a remark on how tired he was will all this games being played.I felt a stab in my chest he had hit a sensitive spot. Citizens were basically being insulted by those they entrusted with their futures. I don’t mean to say that citizens take no fault in this situation but the leaders are to blame too. For treating us like fools like children who can be appeased with candy to forget problems.

All this damage control should have never happened in the first place. If only people opened their eyes and realised they’ve been foolish in their greed. That they spit on the hand that feeds them. Instead we have a  huge bunch of leaders who treat us like children constantly winning arguments by making faces behind our backs.

In all this gloom I left that matatu with  a smile on my face. Because another reality dawned on me. Kenyans are becoming smarter more and more people have seen the light. More children who grew up watching a failing system are coming of age and can now vote and be elected. There’s a new breed of Kenyans creeping up on this unsuspecting leaders. A lot of Kenyans asking the right questions. These are the people that give me hope that if not in this tenure then maybe in the next we will have people in power who actually stand for what the people believe in.

Woe unto those hypocritical leaders who think they will rule in this madness forever. True patriots are rising and it will be such a tragedy when their own children dissociate with them.  When they wake up one day and nobody wants to buy the fake dreams they sell. The day when they’ll realise that the true power is within the citizens they’ve so cruelly betrayed.

#girl49

#diaryof1000girls